“Be My Valentine” funnies by Barbara Dexter

First thing in the morning the Monday before Valentine’s Day the holiday discussion started. Lucy said to the guys “you know the price of flowers goes up as Valentine’s Day approaches. You may be better to get them a couple of days early. You know Valentine’s Day is Friday. You could pay $100.00 or more, if you wait too late, for a simple bouquet of roses.” Then Archer replied “I tried the potted plant thing, you know because they are cheaper, but she wasn’t happy. I figured it wouldn’t die that way and she would have flowers longer than a week or two.” Lennard commented “not to worry, just buy some plastic flowers, they never die and you can give the same thing every year.” Lucy commented “somehow I don’t think that will go over well ” and we all laughed.

Lucy then said “you know all the restaurants will be booked up, you better reserve early.” GQ said to Archer “if you don’t hurry up and make your reservations, you will not eat.” What Lucy replied “there is always a fast food place.”

Then Lennard’s joke got me. What is the difference between a man’s and a woman’s wedding ring? The man’s ring will just melt when you expose it to fire. The woman’s ring will glow hot and if you look on the inside it will read “one ring to find them and one ring to rule them.” of course I said, “I need this ring.”